Whenever we communicate with someone we convey the message not just by words but also by the tone and body language.
The division of the message conveyed by these three forms of communication is so dramatic that it makes one wonder that how many times I have taken wrong message out of other persons communication while relying on words only or by missing out any one of the means of communication.
Body language / Gestures :
Whenever we communicate, the body language comprises of 65% of the message.
The tone conveys 30% of the message.
They are merely 5% of the communication.
Now these stats are not to be taken as 100% rule in all conversations, but with minor difference in various situations we can have an idea how much we’re getting the point and how much we’re missing it if we realize which part of communication we’re missing.
Lets have an example to see how much body language and tone affect the meaning of any conversation and words spoken in it. Imagine you have just passed your very important exam and one of your close friend comes to your home to celebrate it with you. Your brother opens the door and he tells him that you’re in your room and your friend simply enters your room, shuts the door and yells: “bastard! asshole! you passed the exam! ”
Now the person , your brother, standing outside of the room , if relies on the words only will think that the person who entered the room was your enemy or someone jealous of you, and might annoy your brother. However the tone with which he said these words, you can imagine them in your head, would dictate that he is saying them with joy and in fun! See how much difference the tone made and turned the meaning of the words, now once your brother just by chance checked inside the room that what happened to this guy and why is he abusing you, he sees his arms open and moving towards you to hug you, while continuing abusing you, he will definitely get the complete message and idea that he is some very close friend and is saying all this in fun and joy.
So gentlemen, body language, tone and then the words. Don’t turn the sequence otherwise. It’s always important to discuss important things and sensitive issues face to face so that gestures and tone are there too along with the words being spoken for both the people, if not, then atleast tone should be there to have added 30% of the message being conveyed, however 65% would still be missing !
Let me know what are your views and experiences regarding all this ?